I confess that I had not considered this combination of ageism and sexism prior to your post. I've probably been guilty of grandmotherism in the past. Sorry about that. And now that I'm a "gray one" myself, I should know better!
Once again, The Flower Child shines a light on something that needs to be illuminated. Like Rafael, I also had not really thought about it. It wasn't on my radar. Thank you!
I will never be a grandmother or mother either and it's fine with me as I have all these spiritual children which fulfill my life in plenty of ways! I was glad to see you reasoning in different ways which makes one think differently about all these subjects which are usually looked at as traditional entities with their own set of values!
But why do they think grannys wear "oversized glasses, floral prints, pearls, and shawls"? I'm seeing more older women continue dressing how they've dressed before — what a relief.
Yeah, it's a bit of a tired "old" cliche with the shawls and pearls and all. And old men are characterized by being grumpy, with high whiny voices and a "get off my lawn" irritability. Like Homer Simpson's father. Maybe we're part of a generation that will age differently, although still inevitably.
That’s interesting. I didn’t realize people called older women grandmothers if they weren’t actually grandmothers. Just like I wouldn’t refer to someone as a mom if they didn’t have children. While there may be negative connotations to being a grandmother, and some that are more benign but still stereotypical like being sweet and kindly, there’s another “type” as well: Granny on the Beverly Hillbillies was feisty, smart, outspoken and assertive. That’s another way that older women, or “grandmothers” can evolve, in ways that care less about what other people think, and more about what they think and want.
Oh yes, it happens ALL THE TIME. I think grandmothers are awesome — and I also think there's much more to them than just the fact they're grandmothers!
Thank you for your insightful essay, We Aren't All Grandmothers. Your candid reflection challenges the societal assumptions placed on older women, reminding us that identity is multifaceted and not confined to traditional roles. By asserting that not all older women are grandmothers, you encourage a broader understanding of identity that transcends age and familial expectations. Your words serve as a powerful reminder to honor the individuality and complexity of each person, regardless of age.
Thank you so much for your kind and perceptive comment. I’m glad the essay resonated with you. One of my goals in writing We Aren’t All Grandmothers was to push back against the narrow roles society often assigns to older women, and to open space for a richer, more expansive view of identity at every stage of life. Your reflection affirms that intention beautifully. I appreciate your recognition of the individuality and complexity that too often get overlooked, and I’m grateful to be in conversation with readers who value that nuance.
(In an exception to my usual rule, this was written with ChatGPT, to match the comment I'm responding to.)
I confess that I had not considered this combination of ageism and sexism prior to your post. I've probably been guilty of grandmotherism in the past. Sorry about that. And now that I'm a "gray one" myself, I should know better!
Well, you get to be a silver fox! ;-) Not fair, I tell you!
This is excellent. I’m not a grandmother either.
Thank you, Stacey!!
Once again, The Flower Child shines a light on something that needs to be illuminated. Like Rafael, I also had not really thought about it. It wasn't on my radar. Thank you!
Thank YOU, Sandy!!
I will never be a grandmother or mother either and it's fine with me as I have all these spiritual children which fulfill my life in plenty of ways! I was glad to see you reasoning in different ways which makes one think differently about all these subjects which are usually looked at as traditional entities with their own set of values!
Thank you, Evelyne! I know you have guided and inspired many young people!
Women's reproductive status has been considered important, hence the Mrs. vs. Miss vs. Ms. distinction.
Just noticed that they had a Granny Con in Alameda this past March! https://downtownalameda.com/calendar/grannycon-2025/
But why do they think grannys wear "oversized glasses, floral prints, pearls, and shawls"? I'm seeing more older women continue dressing how they've dressed before — what a relief.
Yeah, it's a bit of a tired "old" cliche with the shawls and pearls and all. And old men are characterized by being grumpy, with high whiny voices and a "get off my lawn" irritability. Like Homer Simpson's father. Maybe we're part of a generation that will age differently, although still inevitably.
That’s interesting. I didn’t realize people called older women grandmothers if they weren’t actually grandmothers. Just like I wouldn’t refer to someone as a mom if they didn’t have children. While there may be negative connotations to being a grandmother, and some that are more benign but still stereotypical like being sweet and kindly, there’s another “type” as well: Granny on the Beverly Hillbillies was feisty, smart, outspoken and assertive. That’s another way that older women, or “grandmothers” can evolve, in ways that care less about what other people think, and more about what they think and want.
Oh yes, it happens ALL THE TIME. I think grandmothers are awesome — and I also think there's much more to them than just the fact they're grandmothers!
Seriously over it.
Thank you for your insightful essay, We Aren't All Grandmothers. Your candid reflection challenges the societal assumptions placed on older women, reminding us that identity is multifaceted and not confined to traditional roles. By asserting that not all older women are grandmothers, you encourage a broader understanding of identity that transcends age and familial expectations. Your words serve as a powerful reminder to honor the individuality and complexity of each person, regardless of age.
Thank you so much for your kind and perceptive comment. I’m glad the essay resonated with you. One of my goals in writing We Aren’t All Grandmothers was to push back against the narrow roles society often assigns to older women, and to open space for a richer, more expansive view of identity at every stage of life. Your reflection affirms that intention beautifully. I appreciate your recognition of the individuality and complexity that too often get overlooked, and I’m grateful to be in conversation with readers who value that nuance.
(In an exception to my usual rule, this was written with ChatGPT, to match the comment I'm responding to.)